Lure Love with the Right Elements

Sunday Star,
August 25th 2002
By Kee Hua Chee

Internationally acclaimed feng shui expert Lillian Too is the world's most prolific author on this subject. Her 45 books have sold nearly six million copies and her courses and lectures are inevitably sold out. She is the first Asian woman to run a bank, Grindlays Dao Heng that was then Hong Kong's sixth largest bank. An MBA from Harvard University, she is now enjoying the fruits of her success. Her answers to questions on love, romance and marriage are jotted down by KEE HUA CHEE.

Attracting a soul mate and spouse cannot always be left to the vagaries of fate. If you don't have admirers queuing outside your door each night, why not do something positive to find and attract love ?

Using feng shui to meet that special person can be every effective, so make sure you're ready for marriage before you begin.

The first step is to activate your Love Corner, which is the south-west corner of your home. Place a red lamp or lantern to literally light up your love life. Add a pair of mandarin ducks - preferably carved from rose quartz - or display the Chinese Double Happiness symbol.

Wear gold jewellery featuring the Double Happiness symbol, like the ones I have designed for my Auspicious Jewellery collection, which are available at OE Fine Jewellery or World of Feng Shui at KL Plaza or Mid-Valley.

If you're a single woman, magnify the yang (male) energy of your home and vice-versa for bachelors. But always make sure your south-west corner is always brightly lit day and night.

For ladies to attract men, strengthen the yang or male energy of your home by hanging pictures of male heroes, movie stars, boy bands, corporate tycoons or even illustrations of emperors or images of your ideal man against the kind of lifestyle or background you like.

Keep one picture of a couple holding hands or embracing or doing something romantic. Avoid dark colours and keep your home nicely lit.

To be on the safe side, keep these energising ideas in your living room, not bedroom. Otherwise, your bedroom energy becomes too yang and you might end up being too aggressive in your search and frighten the men away instead!

Do not paint your bedroom red or display dragons if you're unmarried. A phoenix is better.

Even if you're a successful corporate woman, it's better to use the yin-yang principles where women are soft and yielding.

Bachelors tend to have too much yang energy as they normally prefer pictures of ships, guns and military heroes while table items are also male oriented. Display womanly presence with pictures and sculptures of women or the female form. Do not display old paintings or antique pictures from old Chinese classics like Dream of the Red Chamber - most of the women portrayed are not the type you wish to marry. Some are concubines, others are women of loose morals, or worse, vixens disguised as women who used men for temporary pleasure!

Peonies are especially potent symbols of conjugal love. So are orchids, plum blossoms and narcissus.

Q : My toilet is located in my love corner, the south-west corner of my master bedroom! I like my bedroom and do not wish to change rooms. Should I hang wind chimes in the loo and keep the lid closed when not in use as well as shut the door?

A :
That's a bit of a dampener but feng shui has all the answers! If you cannot activate the south-west corner of your bedroom, place all the love energisers in the south-west of your living room or study where you spend plenty of time reading, working or watching TV. Never hang wind chimes in the south-west as they will exhaust your romance. Get a large picture of the Double Happiness and hang it on your bedroom wall.

Q : I have a pair of mismatched mandarin ducks, made of different materials. Is this okay?

A :
It's more important that they are a male and female! Sometimes it's difficult to tell if the pair are not made of the same material.

Q : Are red peonies suitable for everyone?

A :
Yes, they are great love energisers together with the Double Happiness symbol. However, once you're married, remove images of red peonies from your bedroom as they can cause the husband to have a roving eye for a younger girl. This is especially true for couples who have been married for a decade or long periods.

I also advise married couples to avoid watching TV in bed as the screen's reflective surface might promote an unwanted third party to enter your life!

Also avoid mirrors directly facing the bed. A solution is to cover the screen or mirrors with cloth when not in use.

A crystal ball placed at the foot of the bed is good for love Three crystal balls on a bed of rice will attract wealth. Personally, I use a large bowl filled with seven crystal balls and seven types of semi-precious stones.

Q : I am getting married. What can I do to ensure it is fruitful?

A :
I strongly advise the bride to wear the traditional red kua or ceremonial wedding dress with embroidered phoenixes, peonies and symbols of good fortune. It is very auspicious so no matter how modern you are, please get married in a kua!

Do not buy a kua until your marriage is confirmed. Old wives' tales say buying a kua and marriage bed prematurely negates your matrimonial chances. If unmarried, do not sleep in an antique wedding bed.

The bride must not wear black at her own wedding. I have seen brides in an all-black gown during one of he outfit changes! Guests should not wear black as this is seen as unkind. Red Double Happiness signs and red lanterns should be displayed freely. The couple should drink wine mixed with honey in goblets tied with red string, which are exchanged and drank again.

To ensure many healthy and bright children, get a virgin child born in the year of the dragon and ask him or her to roll over the conjugal bed three times.

Q : I am in love with a girl who is a Pig. I am a Snake so we are not supposed to be compatible as we are supposed to be fire and water. So are we good for each other? Should we marry ?

A :
Such astrological mismatches are merely superficial indications of compatibility. If two people are truly in love, what should stop them?

Anyway , your element could well be Earth based on your birth year and she could be Metal so this is ideal! There will always be other aspects that offset the traditional Snake/Pig incompatibility so don't worry.

Q : I heard about the Silver Box routine in wishing for a spouse. I have a gold box and wonder if it is better since gold is richer and stronger than silver.

A silver box is best as this involves the moon which is silvery and fluid. My mother used this Silver Box ritual. She had fallen in love with my father and wrote her deepest wishes and my father's name in the note which she placed inside the box.

I still have this small square silver box which I also used for the same purpose!

Make sure your box is engraved or decorated with peonies, bats and Double Happiness symbols. If round like the moon, place the silver box in the north-west corner of your bedroom. It will attract Heaven Luck. If square, place it in the south-west for Earth Luck. The box can be kept discreetly hidden in a cupboard or under the bed.
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